Most of us have some kind of disagreements with our families from time to time, but what happens when it turns into a feud, and there seems to be no way of resolving it?
We know about the phrase, "You can pick your friends but you can't pick your family", and it's true. We don't like to admit that we just don't like the behaviours of some family members, and they seem to rub us up the wrong way, and we do the same with them. If it were a friend they would soon become an ex friend, but we tend to use another phrase such as, "Blood is thicker than water". Maybe that is just a belief we have been brought up with, and we believe we have to continue putting up with what we perceive as bad behaviour. Most families do forgive and just get on with life, but some keep the feud going forever. Mostly it is about wanting, or the need to want to be in control, and wanting to be right.
"Why can't they see things my way?" is another phrase we often use. They don't see it your way because they have a different map of the world, and perceive things in a different way.
It all comes down to energy in the end, and how much energy you have for someone. If you feel that life is better without that person or persons, then use your energy elsewhere with people who do truly care about you; those who are more understanding and tolerant, those who don't always want to control or to be right, or even expect you to constantly be saying sorry.
The saddest people I have met are those who are determined to be right and even when someone asks them for forgiveness, they dig their heels in and refuse an apology. Of course there are some things that seem unforgivable, but I am talking about those feuds that started out as nothing really and have been made to look as though it was the worst thing the other person could ever have done.
When you let go of that old energy, you feel a million times better. Maybe you still don't want much to do with that person or people, but you feel better. Those who don't end up with that bitter twisted feeling inside, and that harms your health and your psyche.
