Everything springs to life

February

Have you noticed yet that the mornings are getting lighter? It is one of those signs that we get that lets us know that spring is not that far away. It is inspiring especially when we get dull dark days and think that winter will never end.

I was never a keen gardener, my mother was though and she delighted in her tiny patch that she called her garden. I was most disinterested when she talked about gardening, and it was only much later I developed an interest in it. I find it relaxing and feel motivated to want to make the best of it. When I first started I was so surprised when I saw new shoots forming in the first days of spring. It had looked as though the garden was dead, but underneath the soil, eveything was happening. It is great when everything springs to life, and despite the cold and frost, things do survive. I did have some friends living in Vermont, and they could get very little to grow after thier winters of -25. They used to envy our bulbs coming up in spring. They have moved to warmer climates of America now so can grow things more easily.

Relationships can grow as if from tiny seeds, and we need to develop them and watch them grow as we nurture them. The problems arise when we don't take care of them. Sometimes we trample on relationships and expect them to survive. Some do, but they need specialist attention to allow the relationship to grow again. Some are trampled so much that nothing would allow them to grow again.

Do you, or have you ever been trampled on? What did you do to encourage it to grow again?

Siberian winter

February 1st.

Looking out through the window, it looks so cold and snowy, I am glad to be indoors, although I did consider taking the dog out for a short walk.

The more time we spend indoors in the winter, the more time we have to think. I know someone who is so caught up in what happend in the past, they think they ahve to live their life now with the same thoughts and feelings from the past. Usually we are angry because things did not go the way we wanted them to. We see and experience the world through our eyes, and through our experiences. We would like others to see it through our eyes too and through our model of the world, but seldomn they do because they have had different experiences. When couples are together they often mold into each others way, especially if the relationship is good. I think it is what my mother used to refer to as give and take. I call it being in harmony with those closest to us. Yet often the harmony is broken down, by misunderstandings, and by us and others thinking we should see things our way. We try to put old heads on young shoulders, but we all have to learn by experience. Often we can see the pitfalls that people are going to fall into, but until they can see it for themselves or experience it, they will not listen or change in any way. Sad sometimes, because we often see things happening to our kids, but there is little we can do to stop it happening, because they have yet to see it another way.

Worrying times

January 25th

Some people dwell too much on their current problems. They turn them over and over in their mind and then feel thouroughly miserable.

How long do you think we should dwell on negative feelings? And it may be that some people dwell on things that have happend many years ago, and yet still they continue to create those same negative feelings that go along with them. What is more to the point is what good do they do to continue with these same kind of thoughts? they certainly don't make us feel any better, and often we are dwelling on thigns that we cannot change, or things that did not go our way, the way we would like them to. many people spend far too much of their life worrying needlessly. If something in the past happend, then it is the past and probably you cannot change it. If you are worrying about the future, then it has not yet happend. It might happen and then you could begin worrying because that may be the appropriate thing to do at that time, but what is the point of worrying over something that has not happend?

In this climate, and I don't mean the weather, more people are worrying about the future, and making themselves feel very depressed. All they can see is doom and gloom,a nd to go with them on that thought, yes we could say, what if the world ends tomorrow? Would it be facetious to say if it did none of us would have anything else to worry about? how long do you continue worrying?

A mother who worries constantly about her child will continue to worry every time they go out on thier own. her body is on constant alert thinking of all the possibilities that may happen to them. When they arrive home safe and sound, mother breathes a sigh of relief and puts of any more worrying until the next time. I am not saying dad's don't worry the same, they can do, and the principal is the same.

What would happen if you just stopped worrying, and only worried when it was necessary? Your body would not be on high alert for much of the time and you could relax a bit more.

Try this next time you begin to worry:

Let yourself think of the worry. Is there anything you can do about it right now? Do you need to talk to someone who will end the worry for you? Is it something that happned in the past or is it something about the future, a fear?

Now tell yourself that you will allow yourself to worry for about ten minutes. no more no less. Worry as hard as you can, make it worse than ever if you must. Time yourself, and then as soon as the ten minutes is up, stop worrying, put it away, sa if putting it to the back of your mind. Let it go. Remind yourself that if it is something about the past, it may be too late now to change it. If it is something about the future, wait and see what happens and then deal with it at the appropriate time. notice how much better you can feel when you do this. All those horrible feelings in your chest or stomach disappear,a nd you can get on with your day or go to sleep if you are in bed.

January is the time to think of new beginnings

Is this my resolution to create more blogs, or have a just got a few spare minutes right now?

Last year as most of my years since training in hypnotherapy and NLP have been, are extremely busy, and by the time I am going to sleep at night, I just remember that I forgot to do a blog. Some people are bored with blogs, but for some it is a way of getting those thoughts down. Many successful business people use a diary, and they can reflect on the past and learn from it.

Have you ever reached a stage in your life where you think you know all you can or need to know about a subject? I don't think I will ever know all I really need to know about the human mind, or more specifically each and every human mind that I come into contact with. Although our brain is wired up the same way as others, we all think in different ways, due to experiences we have had in life. If someone is successful in life, it is fairly obvious that they are running thier brain in the way that is most useful for them. They may report that they feel at peace with the world, and even when things don't go well for them, they accept it as a natural way of life and that things will change yet again. They are optomistic people, who can usually see good happening to them in the future. They look back at the past and are aware that sometimes it did not go that well, but they got over it and moved on, because that is the only way to be, the future is what is most important to us.

Some people are stuck in the past and can be described as 'carrying baggage'. That reminds me of the time I lived in Liverpool and was going on holiday with my parents to Ireland. We were catching the ferry from Liverpool dock and the walk was considerable. My father was ill and could not carry anything heavy, and my mother did not carry heavy things, so it was left to me to carry two very heavy suitcases, or perhaps I just volunteered. For two days my arms felt as though they had been torn from the sockets, and I could barely raise my arms. I was only 12, and I am sure that if a 12 year old was seen carrying two very heavy bags today, it might get reported to social services, but such was my burden at that time.

the point is, although I can remember carrying the bags, I am not now, and my arms recovered sufficiently enough for me to carry much heavier things through my life. I like to think I am strong enough to do such things.

When will you put the bags down and let go of them and forget abot them?

Cardiac well-being

High blood pressure, high cholesterol, smoking eating too many high fat foods, being overweight......the list goes on and on about how our lifestyle can affect our heart and circulatory system.

Undetected can cause significant damage, so you may be looking at ways to control your BP before embarking on medication. The fact is that doctors don't really know what causes our BP to elevate, and medication does not cure it, but does control it. Of course we need to remember that any drug will have some side effects and we need to be aware of them before taking medication. We can find out so much from the internet, but it can also scare us, but information is better than no information. If you really don't want to know what your body is doing, then you might ask yourself what you are afraid of? For some they would rather face the music than to be kept in the dark, but for others they prefer not to really know what their body is doing and put all thier trust in their doctor. It's a good thing to trsust your doctor if you have a good one, but it is also your responsibility to take care of your body in the best way. That is if you want to live to a ripe old age in a healthy way too.

The drug Statins lowers your choelsterol level, but the long term efects have not yet been established. Benecol is not a drug but comes from plant sterol and can have exactly the same effect as Statins. It may cost more but there are no side effects.

If you want a simple route, then you will be relying on drugs, but if you are reading this because you want to take responsibility for your own life, then there are many ways to reduce srtess in your life, many ways to reversing the effects of stress, and you can learn them as easily as I did.

More people are finding that hypnosis and self-hypnosis is an amazing way to reduce stress and feel calm and relaxed. After hypnosis many people report that they feel so chilled out and stress just rolls of them. Things don't bother them like they used to.

Breathing exercises which can take no more than ten minutes a day that help significantly in reducing hypertension, helps you to sleep more easily and peacefully and gives you that calm and relaxed feeling which shows on the outside as well as the inside.

New Year New You

How many times have you heard that or said that to yourself? What would you like to change about yourself?Maybe nothing, you are just right as you are!

Sadly, not that many people think that about themselves. They are dissatisfied with themselves, wish they were more confident, slimmer, sexier. They wish they had more personality, could get rid of bad habits, and generally be fantastic in every way.

Then they wake up to the real truth that it takes hard work, a strong belief that they can change, and the will to want to change. It often takes the help of others to get them on the right road to change. As human beings, we are not that good at keeping up the momentum, we lose sight of what out goals are, and consequently slide back into our old ways.

Why? Because it is easier to take the path of least resistance, it is easier to come home and slob out watching TV and eating high fat easy to make to cook foods. It is easier to say no to social occasions, easier to stay in the same job, or even with the same person. Change takes effort and time, and for most of the time we continue to say we have no time.

I asked someone the other day about how she could fit in some exercise. I wasn't asking her to join a gym, go running, or spend hundreds on gym equipment or clothes. I was simply asking her if she could find the time to get her body moving.

No time at all she replied, I get home from work, I am too tired to do anything and then it is time for bed. I sked her how Eastenders was going, and she gave me a run down on all the gossip. Ahha I said, so you do have time to do other things? She looked a bit embarrased and then admitted that she does indeed slob out in front of the box for hours on end before falling into bed. All this on a heavy stomach as well!

She had complained that she was a bit depressed, had little social life and was very overweight. I said that I too would be depressed if I were to watch depressing soaps every night, and hardly went out. She had a gym just a short walk away, she had a sewing mahcine that she had bought years ago and never taken out of the box, and had mentioned that she used to love dancing.

Between us we worked out that if she started walking just ten minutes per day or night, joined the local college to learn soft furnishing, she would be making a good start on changing her lifestyle.

The upshot was that she did indeed do all these things, and even decided to join the gym up the road. She became so busy with all that she was doing, that her mood changed, she had no time to watch TV as people started asking her to make things on her sewing machine. She stopped eating high fat foods and immediately felt so much better in her energy levels, her sleep patterns, and her mood generally, and so the weight began to come off, and not feeling the least bit deprived of anything at all.

We can change our mood so quickly, and sometimes all it needs is to know how to do it. Instead of sitting waiting for something to happen, we can make it happen. It takes the tiniest bit of energy to want to change, and from that we can use the energy to create more energy. Everything takes eneregy, we are made from energy, so to keep ourselves on a low light all the time is just not beneficial for us at all.

Doing just one thing different each day creates energy, so what will you do today that is different from yesterday? We can take drugs to help us see things in a more balanced way, but how long do we have to take them? What about if we can be master of our own destiny? If we could, what would be the most significant thing to change first of all?